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I am using a different format for the column this week. I may sometimes use this format. This is a question that someone sent me and the response I had. I hope all you other mothers out there enjoy it. Sincerely, Sonya

Dear Sonya,
The nearer the birth of my second child approaches - I am feeling a little sad that Benjamin will not be my only one any more and what that may do to him. I know it is better for him to have a sibling (or siblings) but does a mother have enough love to go around - or does your heart just expand?? Advice / reassurance would be appreciated! ... Louise

Dear Louise,
I, too, pondered this issue as I awaited Micah's birth two and a half years ago. (I did not question the issue with Christopher last fall.) Sarah was such a sweet, loving little twenty month old and I didn't want to ruin the special relationship we had with her. Yet, the birth of our second child approached quickly and I grew more nervous when it was only days away.

I remember the first time I saw Sarah that next morning after Micah was born. I was of course very protective of the new baby in the sense that I wanted Sarah to be gentle, but the love I had had for Sarah the day before, the week before, the year before, was still there! She was my little girl, still loved more than ever, but there was something that was different. That morning I realized for the first time ever, I think, that she would grow up one day. I guess it was the fact that I realized that she, too, had once been that tiny baby and had laid in my arms as Micah was. She, too, had a time when she couldn't talk or walk or give us hugs and kisses. It was shocking that I had never really realized that she would one day grow up. I still loved her the same, but it was kind of sad for me to realize that as much as I loved her (and each child), they would gradually get bigger and one day lead their own ways.

I was also worried, as you might be, that I wouldn't love the new baby as MUCH as I did Sarah. It's the same idea of not enough love to go around. I can't tell you how amazing it is that God made us so that we can only consume so much food at once, so much knowledge before we freak out, so much exercise before our bodies collapse, but yet we are able to love more and more without difficulty. We only question the ability because there are so many areas of our lives where enough is enough and we can't have "more," but love is not one of those areas.

When you have this little baby, you will want the best for him. You will want him to be happy, just like you want Benjamin to be happy. You would give your own life to save his life, just like you would give your life for Benjamin. You will not let anyone hurt the new baby, just as you don't allow people to hurt Benjamin. You will give him a name, just as you gave your first son a name. You will give him a home, just as you will all your children. You will give him LOVE, just because you are his mother and you will mean it every time you say it, just like you do to Benjamin and will to any other children you bear one day.